SheWolf Leah Clearwater's Story
by Bellalove67
Summary: This is the untold Story of Leah Clearwater in Breaking Dawn. In this story Leah will share her confront her frustrations with Sam and Emily, her life as the only female wolf, and her new pack alliance with Jacob Black.
1. Chapter 1

_That's it. I'm leaving!_ I thought to myself as I stood by the mailbox, at the end of my long driveway. There is only so much that any one person should have to endure in one lifetime, and I had more than doubled my share of hardship. I had already used up the very small amount of patience I had this past year on other people, and I would be damned if I spent another second wallowing in misery! No. This was a new year with a new beginning. No more 'poor Leah' stares and plural pity. No more mooning over ex-lovers and traitorous cousins.

I turned the white, parchment wedding invitation over and over in my hands. The fancy calligraphy and the pale blue stenciled border made me sick to my stomach. What in the hell was that girl thinking, sending me an invitation to her wedding…to the man that _I_ loved, the man _I_ was supposed to marry? You would think that after I backed out of my duties as a bridesmaid she would have taken the hint. Evidently not. Was she just being polite? She couldn't possibly believe that I would actually show up- even if she was family. No, she was probably just rubbing it in my face, the little wretch.

But even as I thought the words, I knew that wasn't true- Emily had been trying to patch things up since the very beginning, but I kept throwing it back in her face every chance I got. Involuntarily, I thought back to the beginning, where it had all started. To when my life took a horribly wrong turn. The memory washed over me- so vivid- like it had been yesterday. I could still feel the anger in my memory, all fresh, as if I was reliving it all over again.

We were standing in my tiny kitchen. I was leaning against the counter, glowering at her from across the room.

"Why don't you just _leave_?" I literally screeched at her, throwing my hands up in exasperation. Our conversation had escalated to an almost violent point, and my family had given us a wide berth, once they realized the reason for our rift.

I took two quick steps in her direction until we were nose to nose. She cowered away from my anger, and huge tears spilled down her beautiful face- her face before the 'accident' as she like to call it.

"Leah, I love you, and I never wanted to hurt you. I can't help it…neither can Sam. You of all people should understand that!" she choked out between sobs. "You know what's it is like for him, how hard this is for him not to have a choice?"

She plopped down, exhausted from yelling, into the kitchen chair. Emily had never been one for confrontation and I could see how it was taking its toll on her. We had been fighting for two days straight. She looked wretched; huge dark circles had formed under her eyes from not sleeping, and they were red and puffy from all the crying. Even her deep russet skin looked sallow, as she sat, frail and shaking, in the little wooden chair. But I didn't care. I was too angry to care.

"Don't you lecture me on how Sam feels! _Of course_ I know how it works- and he may not have a choice, but _you_ do! You could have left, you could have told him _no_, but instead you betrayed me-my own cousin, of all people! You should be ashamed of yourself, Emily."

I took another step so that I was hovering over her now. I crossed my arms across my chest.

"Family comes first," I said in a mocking tone. "Isn't that what you always told me? Ha! What a load of crap- you're nothing but a hypocrite and a traitor to you own flesh and blood."  
She dropped her head into her hands and began sobbing uncontrollably. I stood over her, watching her whole body shake with her crying. Normally, I would never have lashed out at anyone like this, especially Emily. She and I had always been very close, like sisters. I couldn't recall a time we had even so much as an argument. This poor pitiful girl should have moved me to tears, but I couldn't bring myself to feel anything other than rage and hatred towards her now.

I should have stopped at that, but the rage was like a powerful river inside me, churning, and overflowing. It welled up on my tongue and spilled out like acid.

"I hate you!" I hissed. "I hope you get what's coming to you. What goes around, comes around…you just keep that in mind." I turned on my heel and walked towards the screen door. "Don't be here when I get back," I yelled over my shoulder.

I heard the chair scrape across the floor and fall with a loud bang on the hardwood. Rushing footsteps followed behind me.

"Leah, don't go! I'm-"

I whirled around and cut her off mid sentence.

"Don't you _dare_ say you're sorry! I don't want to hear it, Emily. Everything you do proves otherwise. Just stay away from me…both of you! You are _nothing_ to me anymore. Do you understand?"

The words didn't come out heated and angry like I expected- they were cold and steely. I couldn't begin to fathom what my expression looked like, but Emily stopped short, and her hand flew to her throat, shocked. My words had cut deeply, and oddly, I was glad. At any moment, I expected a wave of guilt to dam up the river of anger inside me, but it didn't. Just more rage. I was shaking, to the point I created vibrations in the floor. So quickly the room became a blur, I whipped around and flew out he door and down the porch steps, breaking into a run down the driveway.

I didn't know where I was going. My tears had started flowing freely now, and I could scarcely see anything through the haze. I slowed to a walk hoping the slower pace would calm my nerves. I practiced taking slow deep breaths, in and out through my nose, and eventually my walk slowed to standing, and I sat down in a large open field, just off the reservation.

I hadn't realized I'd walked as far as I did, but I could see the reservation off in the distance, sitting on the cliffs bordering the beach. I was glad I hadn't gone in the coastal direction- it would have just dredged up more painful Sam memories.

How could this have happened? I still couldn't wrap my mind around it. Had it only been four days since he told me? It seemed liked only hours. I couldn't believe Sam and I weren't together anymore. All he did was _look_ at her, for heaven's sake, and _boom_- like a light switch- out with Leah, and in with Emily.

The pain was unbearable, like someone had taken sawed me in half. I had heard of amputee patients losing a limb, and then waking up in the middle of the night to scratch a leg that was no longer there. Or worse; being plagued with pain from the removed appendage. And that was exactly how I felt- as if part of me had been cut away unwillingly, like someone had amputated my heart.

I kept playing it over and over again in my head, wishing I could turn back time, and revoke my invitation for Emily to visit. How long could I have kept her away? Forever? My anger told me that I could, but I knew that wasn't the case. She and Sam would have met at some point, and what stage would we have been in our relationship then? We were already engaged- married maybe? Would he have imprinted on her as she walked down the aisle as my _bridesmaid?_ With me standing at the back of the procession, the blushing bride in my pretty white dress, only to be left at the alter, alone?

Marriage, ugh! Just thinking the about the wedding brought on a new wave of despair. I looked down to the tiny silver band on my left hand and winced. I was refusing to take off the ring, hoping that Emily would leave, and Sam and I could go back to the way things were before she came. Of course, it was nice to think that could work, but I knew deep in my heart, that it wasn't true. I was just delaying the inevitable.

I didn't know what, or who, I was madder at; Sam for falling in love with someone else, or Emily for choosing to be with him. Thinking it through, I suppose Sam had no choice. I had been there when his wolf had overtaken him- he was the first of his generation to shift. He had been so scared, talking to the elders every night, learning as much as he could about the legends, their meanings, and what he was to become. I was his solace, his rock- and it wasn't easy. The whole wolf thing freaked me out as much as it did him. It isn't everyday that your boyfriend tells you he is a wild animal. Not many girls got to hear that speech- It doesn't really roll off the tongue all that well:

"_Hi honey, so how was your day. Mine was good. You look really pretty- is that a new dress? Oh, and by the way, sometimes I turn into a giant wolf when I lose my temper… So, what's for dinner?_

Even through that difficult time, we had been truly happy and in love. And then it was gone. I was all alone.

"Hey Leah!" I jerked my head up at the sound of my brother's voice, relieving me from my painful memory.

"Hey, Seth." He was jogging down the driveway looking at me warily. I hadn't realized I had been standing here for as long as I had until he caught my attention. It was raining and I was soaked.

"Did the mailman leave you a love note?" He teased. "Don't worry, I told him that he wasn't your type. He's way too old for you."

"Thanks, but no. No love notes today."

I sighed.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked, his eyes slipped down to the white paper I was clutching in my hand. I held it up and rolled my eyes.

"It's Sam and Emily's wedding invitation."

"Oh." His happy go lucky demeanor vanished, and he put his hand on my shoulder, looking at me with the pitiful expression I was all too familiar with…and sick of.

"Oh. stop looking at me like that, Seth. It's fine!" I exploded. His hands flew up in front of him defensively and his eyes popped open.

"Hey now, take it easy, Leah. I didn't say anything!"

I shoved the invitation at him, crushing it against his chest as he sought to keep it from falling towards the wet ground. I stomped up the driveway and onto the porch, not bothering to take my boots off as I walked inside towards my room. I could hear my mother bustling around in the kitchen, the homey smell of fried chicken floated through the house.

I skulked into my room and plopped onto my bed. _I have to get out of here_, I thought to myself. The weight of La Push, of my wolf, of Sam and Emily, was just too much. I had sucked it up for over two years now, putting the packs needs, Sam's orders, my mother's loneliness, even protecting blood sucking leeches ahead of my own well being for too long now.

I laid there, mulling over my thoughts for a few minutes until I calmed down. I had past anger long ago and had now moved on to bitterness. It was hard to think back to the days that I wasn't consumed with hatred and vile thoughts, to think back to a time where I was a carefree and warm young girl, with a bright future ahead of her. All these things I had sacrificed for everyone else.

I stood up, pushing myself off the small bed I had since I was a little girl, and walked across the hallway into the bathroom. I turned on the light and closed the door. I placed both hands on either side of the countertop and peered at my reflection in the mirror. The light cast a strange florescent glow in the room, but I looked harder, past the stranger reflected back to me with the hardened eyes, frozen in time, and tried to see my former self.

My hair was short now, in no particular coif, just short. And my eyes were still the same dark brown as always, but they were cold and distant- similar to soldiers who had been at war for too long. Unfeeling. I pushed past this image and, again, made myself try to see the old me.

I knew in my head that the old me, the pre-wolf me, the pre-Sam me, was…vibrant. The old me had thick, sleek, straight black hair that fell to the middle of my back. The old me had eyes that were a deep brown, almost black, and sparkled when I smiled. I was pretty- more than pretty, actually. I had been the unattainable girl. The girl the other reservation boys used to chase after, the girl who was always desired, but never had a second look for anyone who expressed an interest- until Sam. The girl who broke the other boys hearts when I had chosen him.

I wanted so badly to be that girl again. I _wanted_ to be fun, pretty, and carefree. I wanted more than anything to be her, but I didn't know how. _That_ girl was no longer vibrant. She was…missing.

I hung my head in disappointment. Was this my fate- to be this empty, missing, hollow shell of a girl? I refused to accept it, to embrace these damaged pieces, these flaws in myself any longer. I would not curl up with bitterness and loneliness, and take them to bed with me anymore. I would stand up against them and force myself to move on and be the person I longed to be!

I raised my head again and looked in the mirror. I couldn't see the old me, the girl I longed to be….yet. But I wanted it. I felt a passion for it. I felt stronger about this than I had about anything in a long time.

The feeling washed away the lifelessness inside me; it pulsed through my veins like a tidal wave. I would deal with all these problems, these past demons that haunted my soul and left me in despair, and then I would arise anew.

I stared harder at the cold, dead me in the mirror, and the same river that carried my hatred for everyone- for Emily, for Sam…even myself, began to surge. It was as strong as that fateful day in the kitchen with Emily, bubbling up and threatening to spill over the dam, but this time it was not a feeling of hate. They were feelings of hope, and they rushed through me like an alpha command.

I straightened up, and let these new welcome feelings ripple through me and out of me. I reached out with my fist, and with one triumphant yell, I shattered the bathroom mirror into a million pieces, letting the hard, bitter me shatter along with it.

The glass bounced off every surface in the tiny bathroom, and the shards glittered on the floor in the light. I looked down at my bleeding hand, which had already begun to heal, and found the symbolism in this moment. I would confront all my swallowed feelings that had turned me into this bitter woman and move on with my life. Just like my hand would heal from this initial shattering of the past; so would my soul.

I didn't know how I would do it, but I was definitely going to try. Starting now.


	2. Chapter 2

The glass was still laying in tiny, glittering, specs on the floor of the bathroom when I stepped into the hall to find a broom and dust pan. I was halfway down the hall, my hand completely healed, when I ran into the surprised faces of my mother and Billy Black. My mother was holding baby Clair, sound asleep, in her arms.

"Leah honey, are you okay?" she asked, concerned. "We heard something break."  
Her expression of worry ran deeper than normal- she was constantly hovering over me, worried about my depression. I think she believed I had anger management issues. She had even offered to send me to a shrink, but then realized that broken-hearted- werewolf- imprinting syndrome was not exactly, what you would call, a clinically proven, psychological disorder.

I forced a wide smile- which was much easier then I expected- at she and Billy as I past them in the hall.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I can't say the same for the bathroom mirror, though. It's busted," I explained, trying to be nonchalant. I didn't want to have to explain my personal epiphany. "Don't worry, I'll get it fixed. Keep Claire off the floor for a few minutes, okay? I don't want her to cut her feet."

I stroked my finger down Claire's cheek as I walked by, wondering why she was here. Neither of them said a single word. They just stared at me, gaping in shock. I turned the corner to the kitchen and grabbed the broom and dust pan from the pantry. As I walked back towards the bathroom I greeted Billy, who had turned slightly in his wheelchair to look me up and down skeptically.

"Hey Billy, how's it going? I hear Rachel is back from college?

"Yeah, it's great to have her home," he replied in the proud, reverent tone that only parents used. "Can't say the same about having Paul around, though."

I chuckled. Paul seemed to have the same effect on everyone.

"You seem to be in a good mood today." He added, but it sounded like more of an accusation than a compliment.

"Thanks." I replied cheerfully. My mother balked in surprise at my jubilant response. I usually avoided conversation with her at all cost. These days I tended to avoid conversation with just about anyone, actually.

I opened the door of the bathroom and began sweeping up the glass in fast, jerky movements. I popped my head around the corner again, looking at Billy.

"I haven't seen Rachel in a long time." I began, "How's she doing?"

He crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes slightly. Clearly, he was just as surprised at my sudden interest as my mother.  
"She's doing really good- aside from her choice in boyfriends, that is." He grumbled. "She graduated early, not that I'm surprised. She was always the little over achiever, and she got a degree in Psychology. She said she may work at the school here on the reservation as a guidance counselor for a while, until she decides if she wants to go back and get her graduate degree."

_Psychology?_ I thought. Well, that held some promise. Plus, since Paul had imprinted on her, she was well versed in our legends. Maybe I could talk to _her_? She did have a degree, after all, which meant she was somewhat of a professional. I just hoped that her interests would cover damaged, bitter, ex-lovers who were flirting with borderline insanity, and not just school children. It was worth a shot. What was the worst she could say? No?

She and I had been good friends through high-school, right up until her mom died. She became really withdrawn after that, something that I was all too familiar with. Perhaps, that was why she didn't visit as often. I knew how badly I constantly wanted to escape La Push, and the nagging pain and resentment I felt towards Sam and Emily. I couldn't imagine if it was my _mother_, and when I was her age. I was still pretty torn up about my father- so was my little brother, but mom's were different; harder to lose, I thought. In that moment, thinking about Rachel's pain over losing her mother, made my pain over Sam seem petty- further proof that I needed, and I was ready, to try and move on.

"Maybe I'll give her a ring this weekend. I'll see if she wants to catch a movie or something." I suggested. "I haven't seen her in forever, and it would be great to have some girl time!"

My mother's eyes popped out of their sockets. Billy smiled wider, showing all of his teeth.

"Definitely!" he replied, enthusiastically. "She'd like that. I know she has wanted to get out of house, and it would give Jake and me some peace and quiet for a few hours. Not to mention, it would cut down on the grocery bill. I can't afford both of those boys- they'll eat me out of house and home."

My mother and I both laughed at the same time. Seth was fifteen, and had the same appetite. We teased him that he could eat half his own body weight in one sitting.

My mother beamed at me- it seemed her suspicion of my inexplicable pleasantry was overruled by her happiness in seeing me so…well, anything other than angry. Then, she raised her eyebrows quickly and gave a little start, as if she just remembered something very important.

"Oh, that reminds me!" She said, her face suddenly very businesslike. "Quil, just stopped by and told me to tell you that Sam, needs you…all of you, right away. Seth just left with him."

Well, that explained what Claire was doing here. My good mood faltered just a tiny bit at the mention of Sam's name. _Think positive_, I thought to myself. This was the first I had smiled in a long time, and I wasn't going to let Sam ruin it.

I took a deep breath, setting the full dust pan on the bathroom counter. Grabbing one of the leather cords I kept in the second drawer, I ran down the hallway and out the front door.

"Bye! Tell Rachel I'll call her tomorrow," I called over my shoulder. I hoped they heard me in my rush. Thankfully, I didn't have to put up pretense in front of my mother or Billy- they knew what Seth and I were.

I darted across the yard and into the bordering trees, pulling my shirt off over my head as I ran. Once inside the safety of the trees I began pulling off the rest of my clothes. _Ugh!_ I thought to myself. The boys had it so easy. They all walked around half naked, with only a pair of shorts on. I felt like I was in a cologne commercial, half the time. They didn't have to worry about, bras and underwear…or shoes. They didn't care that they looked like muscled up vagabonds, but I did.

I slipped off my shoes and my jeans, and the rest of the under garments, and laid them neatly in a pile by the tree, only tying my shirt around my thigh with the cord. I hoped it wouldn't start raining again. It was virtually impossible to put pants on once they were soaking wet. I had too many clothes to tie all of them around my leg like the boys did. And I had made way too many nearly-naked dashes from the tree line to the house in the past. The neighbor boys were beginning to look at me in ways that made me uncomfortable, even when my clothes were on. I made a mental note to tack a garbage bag to one of the trees for future use.

Now that I was down to my birthday suit in the middle of the woods, a feeling I could never imagine myself getting used to, I centered myself and began to concentrate on phasing. The heat emanated from my chest at first, like a fireplace of hot coals, and ran down my arms and legs, vibrating in spasms, eventually making its way up my throat and over my head. The heat increased and rocketed down my spine like lightening, until it felt my skin would burst, and then, instantly, it was over. The heat melted away and only the soft shimmer of the transformation remained, as I saw my hands change to small grey paws, and then hit the ground with a soft thud. I stretched my back, lifting my haunches in the air, and then shot out into the forest with lightening speed.

I listened carefully, for a hint as to what this meeting was all about. Sam rarely called the pack together unless there was serious problem. I could hear the thoughts of the others, but nothing to give away the motive behind the meeting. It was just the normal noisy babble. I concentrated harder.

I picked up the thoughts of Jacob Black first. Probably because he was only a few yards away. I made a point to run a parallel line to him so I didn't cross his path. Of course, he was moping. Wasn't he always? I was sure in anyone's mind's eye that I was the most miserable and depressed member of the pack, but lately Jacob's ran a very close second. His thoughts centered around one thing and one thing only. Bella Swan. And today was no exception. He was already in full-on pity party mode.

Secretly, I felt sorry for him, and luckily I was able to sensor my thoughts around the pack. Sure, I didn't have total control, but I did have the ability to limit what thoughts were on public display for everyone to witness. Boys, ha! They were so simple. They were only able to think one way- no wonder women were such a mystery to them! Their sole thought process was always blunt and to the point, with zero finesse. They didn't have the skill at veiling their thoughts like women did.

All women (even when they are little girls) are able to say one thing, but actually mean something else entirely, which allows us to get what we want. We always appear to be a conundrum to men- and the pack plural was no exception.

It was sad in a way. All of them were so frustrated all the time. Whatever they thought, and the second they thought about it, there it was- out in the open wolf forum. They were nothing but a bunch of open books.

Jacob's thoughts caught my attention again. They were louder than the others, and more violent too. He was thinking about the wedding…again. And how he wished he would have killed Edward Cullen…again. Even though I was getting tired of this re-run of his, I could feel the pain and desperation behind his thoughts, and it scared me.

_So self-absorbed all the time_, I thought to him, deliberately letting it sound like a jibe. I hoped it would distract him

It worked, but he only had time to get in one tiny dig before Sam silenced us.

_Can it, guys_, he said

Why did I always have to get grouped in with _guys_? Would it have been so hard to say our names? I heard Jacob's thoughts again and I smiled to myself. He thought I was being touchy. Easy for him to say- what if he was the only male wolf in a pack of females? I wondered how kindly he'd take to being grouped in with the _girls_.

We made our way east to a small clearing, and I dug my claws into the dirt and sped up at the very end- I didn't miss the opportunity to rub in my superior speed to Jacob, or anyone else for that matter. If they all got to be bigger, at least I was faster. The rest of the pack caught up and we formed a small circle. Sam began, informing us that Bella and Edward were back from their honeymoon. Right, like we cared.

Evidently, they had returned last week, but Charlie hadn't had a chance to see Bella. She was claiming to be sick. Ha! Well, maybe she was…mentally. Any girl who chased after vampires had to be mentally unstable. But we all knew this was her alibi for becoming a vampire. This meeting was to decide if we would allow this to slide, or if it broke the treaty.

Jacob was across from me and I saw his head drop slightly as he pawed the ground, making divots in the dirt. He was worrying about the logistics of her "death."

_So she would die of this disease, as far as Charlie knew. Would they let him view the corpse? They couldn't let him touch the cold skin- he might notice how hard it was. _He didn't notice but everyone else had tuned in exclusively to his thoughts now.

_Would they bury her? Would she dig herself out, or would the other bloodsuckers come for her eventually?_

His thoughts were morbid, but I had to admit, none of us had considered that level of complexity before. Seth began to advocate for Bella, a line of defense that didn't sit right with any of us. Nobody really liked his affection for the vampires, but he did have a point, and Sam was taking Seth's side. I sat still, listening to the banter between Seth and Jacob.

_What are you going to do when Bella fights with them, huh? You gonna be the one to take her down? Or will you make one of us do it? _He thought. None of us missed Jacob cringe at that thought, but nevertheless he crouched down and snarled at Seth, trying to intimidate him. It didn't work. Seth stood his ground, playing the bigger person, before Sam jumped in and shut it down.

The rest of conversation continued along the same path, each wolf agreeing that Bella had chosen her own path, and that she was well informed. I sat down, slightly outside the circle as Sam gave the Alpha command that we, the pack, were not going to attack the Cullen's. I was perfectly at peace with this course of action. If Bella Swan wanted to walk the earth for eternity as one of the undead, more power to her. Normally, I wouldn't have been so cavalier regarding any other human, but she had chosen her side long ago. Jacob was just having a hard time letting go.

At that moment, Jacob tucked his tail and ran away. What a surprise. He said he was going wolf and although nearly everyone begged him to stay, I knew better. He ran away swiftly, disguising his thoughts, focusing on how to go 'all wolf' as he had done in the past, but I was too skilled at veiling my own thoughts not to pick up on subtle underlying tenor beneath them. This was all a mental ruse to keep the pack out of his head until he phased.

We felt the slight shimmer as he changed back into his human form and the empty feeling of the pack after Jacob left lingered in the air like thick fog, and all of his brothers let out sad whines and whimpers of confusion, once they could no longer hear him.

_That was strange_, Sam thought.

_Where did he go?_ _I thought he was staying wolf, like last time?_ Quil joined in.

_Maybe he went to tell Billy bye this time._

Over the next two hours they all took turns offering up scenarios, but they were all wrong, and I knew it. I yawned loudly, hoping to show my obvious boredom with the banter. I was ready to go home, so I stood up and stretched before I made my way back to the circle. I took a seat in an empty space beside Paul, and out of sheer impatience, rejoined the conversation.

_You don't really think he's doing any of those things do you?_ I thought rolling my eyes. Everyone stopped talking at once and turned to look at me, skeptically.

_Well, think about_, I began_._ _He wants the pack to take out the Cullens so he is probably on his way there now._ I said, looking directly at Sam. I ignored the ache in the pit of my stomach as I stared into his eyes. No sooner than I had finished the last word, the hair on his back bristled and he glared at me.

_He's can't disobey the Alpha's command, Leah. I have forbidden any act of violence against the Cullen's._

I sighed, exasperated.

_Yes, oh lofty Alpha, you did forbid it. But your specific words were that the __**pack**__was not to take any action against the Cullens._  
Sam and the rest of the pack looked at me with blank expressions. Obviously, this was not sinking in.

_I swear, you boys are so dense it is criminal! The __**pack**__ is forbidden to take action, but not an __**individual**__**member**__…._I let my sentence trail off suggestively. Surely, they could understand where I was going with this now.

It took a few seconds, but eventually recognition flashed across their faces, and low unanimous grumble erupted.

_He wouldn't do that!_ Seth argued. _You're just making accusations, Leah. How can you know that for sure?_

_Because it's clever, and it the only way to get what he wants. It is just a matter of semantics; he knows he can't __**challenge**__ Sam's edict, so he's finding a way to work __**around **__it. He's thinking like a girl._ I replied smugly.

Paul was standing slightly in front of me and turned around to glance at me mockingly.

_If you mean he's being emotional and neurotic, then absolutely, he's thinking like a girl. _He turned back around and barked out a loud laugh. I stiffened in defense at first, but cowered down, slinking over towards him. He let out a loud yelp as I sank my teeth into his hamstring.

He turned quickly trying to take a bite out of my shoulder, but I neatly dodged his attack, and circled around behind him and nipped at his tail. He howled in frustration and embarrassment as the rest of the pack began silently laughing.

_Paul, Leah, cut it out!_ The double timber of the Alpha command ripped through both of us and we cowered down on our bellies at the same time, whining. As humiliating as it was to be commanded into submission, by an ex-lover, I had to admit that it was probably for the best. I wasn't worried about Paul so much as I was about Jacob. He had been gone for a while now, and the tension was already building. No one wanted a war with the Cullen's, especially not me. I wanted to move on with my life, and this was promising to throw yet another glitch in that process.

_What do we do now then?_ Quil thought quietly. I could hear the worry and desperation in his voice. _Do we go after him, and try to stop him?_

Sam turned his big furry head around to face all of us.

_No, we wait……_


	3. Chapter 3

The afternoon seemed to drag on forever. Minutes became hours, hours seemed like days, as we waited for Jacob. All the wolves were spring loaded and antsy, as they sat together putting their revenge plan together if "even so much as a hair on his coat was ruffled." They all pranced around the makeshift clearing, each one on edge and straining their already acute hearing to pick up the slightest sound of either Jacob's return or a vampire advance.

I lay on the ground away from the group, as was my custom, while the rest of them let the testosterone and adrenaline drive them in maddened little circles. Any second, I expected one of them to get dizzy and fall over. Only Sam was standing still at the edge of the clearing without so much as a twitch of his tail. I listened past the chaotic din of the others to isolate his thoughts. He was worried, not only about Jacob's safety, but also worried that Jacob's brash behavior would force the rest of the pack into a dangerous situation. Other, more ardent, thoughts began to surface from the pack as well.

_What if they already finished him off_, thought Jared.

_I'll rip them all apart myself, if they did_, Paul chimed in

The rest of the pack let out low snarls in unison, each member committing to the demise of the Cullen family. This new musing of Jared and Paul was causing the pack to get rowdy. Sam turned around slowly, glaring fiercely at each one of us.

_"That's enough! Everyone calm down. We're not doing __**anything**__ until we know what is going on."_ He commanded. Although the command was firm, it was not an Alpha command. It silenced everyone momentarily, but a few minutes later the frenzy picked back up with ever more fervor than before.

_"I'll bet Edward and his brothers ripped his head of before he even had a chance to phase_. _That's why we haven't heard anything, yet…he's dead_." Embry thought quietly, but you could feel the despair behind it.

_"Dirty leeches" _someone else added.

I pushed myself up to a seated position and looked around. I had had enough of this manly banter. How they managed to function in everyday life was a mystery- they were idiots!

_"Can everybody just chill out, please?"_ I piped up. _"I'm sure Jacob's fine."_

Every wolf in the pack turned and looked at me like I was insane.

_"Fine? He's with a coven of hungry leeches, and you think he is fine?"_ Paul snapped. _"He went over there to kill one of them by himself. Jared's right, he probably is dead. Those nasty little ticks probably didn't let him phase- that one with all the scars probably fights dirty."_

I sighed, swallowing my irritation. You have to be patient with children, I reminded myself, and all men are essentially children.

_"Do you really think the Cullen's would risk a war with our entire pack because of one misguided, lovesick member?"_ I asked.

No answer. I could feel Sam's thoughts heavily against my own, as if they were a pair of eyes boring into the back of my skull. He agreed, but he didn't interrupt me, so I continued.

_"That's what I thought."_ I concluded in a matter of fact tone.

Paul, evidently the self-proclaimed mouthpiece of our little group today, offered up yet another half-assed conclusion.

_"Whatever Leah, Bella's blood sucking husband probably heard him coming and…." _He trailed off at the end."

Arrogantly, I stood up and walked over to Paul, stopping only inches in front of him. I began walking around him in a slow circle, and even though he towered over me, I managed to look down my nose at him.

_"Seriously Paul, do you really think the Cullen's would have to __**kill **__him to keep him from attacking Edward, if he was in his human form?"_

_ "No, but they- "_

_"Exactly. They could easily restrain him, so there would be no sense in killing him." _I interrupted.

_"Yeah, but what if Edward could hear what he was thinking…about Bella and all? What if he got jealous and lost his temper? I know if some other guy looked at Rachel that way I'd…"_

The rest of the pack was still silent, but I could feel the tension beginning to dissipate. I looked over my shoulder and shot Sam an exasperated look. _Anytime, you want to jump in here and help me derail Paul from his idiotic caveman rationalization is fine by me_, I thought. He looked over at Paul and then back to me, but said nothing.

I rolled my eyes, and turned back to Paul.

_"Ugh! Don't me so dramatic! I know that it is painful for you to use your brain for something other than, oh, I don't know, breathing, but try. As much as I hate that you are putting me in a position that I have to defend a coven of vamps, Edward and the rest of his family are perfectly rational…beings." _I couldn't bring myself to actually think the word "people." _"And I'm sure if he was going to kill Jacob over something as petty as jealousy, he would have done it last spring when the two of them made out with each other…not even twenty yards from him."_ I explained.

Paul bristled a little, having lost ground in the argument, but stupidly, he persisted further.

_"Well, maybe he phased and then they all took him down." _

Was I really having this conversation? What a moron.

_"Um, well then, obviously we would have seen that if he was in his wolf form, you idiot."_

I turned my back on him and walked back to my spot on the outskirts of the group. I lay down with a world weary gesture, making a show of being drained by his stupidity. He growled and stalked towards me and I pulled back my muzzle in a mocking smile.

_"Paul, give it a rest already,"_ Sam ordered. Paul whined tucking his tail between his legs and walked over to sit with Embry and Collin.

I laid my head on my paws and closed my eyes, forcing myself to be patient and wait for Jacob, but I could feel Sam's gaze on me again. Except this time it wasn't boring into my head, it was softer somehow. I looked up and stared into his brown eyes- even in his wolf form they smoldered- and I tried to ignore the flip flops in my stomach, especially now that we were all in this form and could hear each other's thoughts. It was bad enough that I had spent so much time pining over him, but it was humiliating to have to do it front of a bunch of insensitive, macho boys.

I couldn't pick up on any particular thoughts, but I could tell he was making an effort to keep whatever he wanted to think silent. I locked my thoughts up as well, but I smiled- as best I could in this furry form- at him. His eyes widened and then softened again- I hadn't smiled at him in a very long time. In fact, I hadn't had a single thought about him or towards him that wasn't lined with blind hatred since he'd imprinted. Now that I thought back, I didn't really hate him at first, not the way I hated Emily at least. It wasn't until the "accident" occurred.

I remembered that day all too well. It was right after the last fight I'd had with Emily. I had called her a traitor, and a hypocrite. I had disowned her, kicked her out of my house and asked her to leave. And I wasn't even sorry. If she and Sam wanted to be together, if she wanted to stand by and tear my life apart, then so be it, but I'd be damned if she was going to do it _my_ house, with the man _I_ loved, and with me standing there watching! I had left her standing by the front door in a flood of tears as I ran from the house.

While I was off venting my anger and frustration that evening, cursing her name to the high heavens, and damning her to the deepest pit of hell I could imagine, little did I know that she had packed up her things and planned to leave the Quiluette reservation and go home.

She walked down the long path that ran behind most of the houses on the reservation until she came to the little stream that led out to the ocean, where she knew she would find Sam. That was his favorite spot since he had first found out what he was. He and I had spent hours there. He said that was the only place he could find his center, the only place that held enough stillness and peace for him to be able to phase back to his human form at first. Now this was his and Emily's spot.

I had seen this scene, layered with guilt by Sam's thoughts, play over and over in his mind since that fateful day. It couldn't have been more than a few hours since she and I had our fight that she had run down the small hill onto the embankment of the stream where he stood.

She still had dark circles under her eyes, and fresh tears streamed down her pretty face. He turned to look at her and his heart just soared with excitement, and then after taking in her forlorn expression he had nothing but concern for her. He wiped her tears away with his thumbs and kissed her cheeks, and then the top of her head, hugging her against him. She hugged him back briefly, but pushed away from him and moved a few steps away before she spoke.

"I have to leave Sam, I just can't do this. It isn't fair to Leah." She chocked out between sobs.

His entire face fell at her dejection.

"Is this your decision or Leah's?" he demanded.

"It's mine." She said solemnly. "You know I would be with you if I could, but I can't hurt Leah this way. She is like a sister to me!"

"I know," He said sincerely. "I love Leah too, but it isn't the same anymore. I have no control over these things. Leah is an understanding person. She knows what it is like…she was there with me from the beginning. Just give her some time…she'll come around."  
Emily put her hands over her face and bawled into them, shaking her head back and forth.

"No she won't, she hates me! She won't even talk to me." She wailed.

"She's just hurt right now, that's all." He said reassuringly.

She pulled her tiny hands away from her face and her eyes were frantic. They darted all over the place, never settling on any one thing in particular.

"You should have heard the things she said to me, Sam! They were just plain hateful. I've never seen her so cold before- it was like somebody flipped a switch inside her, it's like she's made of ice. But she's right!"

He frowned, clearly upset by her statement. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders.

"Aww, c'mon. I know Leah and it couldn't have been that bad. What did she say?"

"She said I was a hypocrite and a traitor to my own flesh and blood. She said I betrayed her. She said she hates me and that I have it coming. She told me I was _nothing _to her anymore." The words were tumbling out her mouth, now.

"I'm a horrible person!" She sobbed into his shirt.

Sam was visibly upset now and his hands had begun to shake on her shoulders, but he took a few deep breaths trying to steady himself.

"Look, she is just really upset right now and mad at everyone. I have a part in this too. It isn't fair for her to put this all on your shoulders. I'll talk to Leah."  
She pulled her face back away from his chest and stared up at him, her eyes wide.

"No!" she exclaimed. "That won't work…it'll just make it worse. I have to leave, Sam. This isn't going to work. I'm so s-sorry."

Sam's face crumpled into a mask of sorrow as she turned away from him and walked up the trail. He took two quick steps grabbing her by the arm and turned her around to face him.

"Please don't go." He begged. "I'll talk to Leah and make her understand." He was staring at the ground frustrated and shaking harder now. Emily looked down at his hand on her arm and tried to pull away.

"It won't work, Sam. She is my cousin and even though I love you…family comes first." She whispered to him. She leaned up slowly on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. His beautiful face looked like it would crack in half from the pain as a huge tear rolled down the side of his face.

"You're breaking my heart, Em! I can't exist without you." He pleaded.

His entire body was shaking to the point of vibrating. He tried taking deep breaths and put his hands on his temples to calm himself down, but he kept gasping at the air and shaking even harder.

Emily pulled her arm away softly and ran her fingers through his long hair and down his cheek trying to help, but the tears were streaming down his face now too.

"Leah's was right. _You _many not have a choice, but _I_ do. She asked me to leave so I'm going. I'm doing this for her. I'm sorry!"

That was it, he had broken his hold on self control, and with one loud desperate yell his whole body rocked and convulsed with wild spasms. His arms flew out in front of him and he rocked back onto his hind legs. His arms and hands changed to paws and he leaned forward, clumsily trying to find the ground with his front legs, but Emily was too close and couldn't get out of the way in time. His left paw came crashing down on her face, gashing into the skin, and knocking her to the ground. She screamed out in pain and horror as she scrambled to her feet with one hand, and ran towards the house holding her face with the other.

I got home much later that evening and she was still on the couch with all the elders, including Sam, gathered around her. At first I was furious. Who where they to console _her_? She was the deceitful one not me. So what if she was upset? She deserved it!

It wasn't until I saw the tribal doctor stand up, with a handful of bloody gauze, that I realized something was very wrong. I took a closer look now, surveying the room. Emily was on the end of the sofa with her head limp against the pillows, and my mother was holding something to her face that looked like an icepack. The rest of the tribal elders were whispering soothing words to Sam, who sat hunched on the floor at her feet. He had his face buried in her lap and he was crying.

At that moment the doctor walked by me to throw away the bloody mess he held in his hands.

"What's going on?" I whispered to him as he past.

He opened the lid on the metal trash can and tossed the gauze in. Then he walked over to the sink and began washing his hands.

"There's been an accident. Emily was attacked by an animal down by the stream. We think it was a bear, by the size of the claw marks on her face" he explained in a hushed whisper over his shoulder. "I stitched up the wound as best I could, but it is going to leave some permanent damage. She was really shaken up so I've sedated her. You can talk to her when she wakes up."

I felt my stomach do a complete flip. Her face? Permanent damage? I tried to make the words make sense but they were just swimming around in my head. We had never had a bear on the reservation before, this couldn't be right. The only large animals we had on the reservation were wolves, and they weren't even real wolves; they were people. But nobody except tribal elders and myself knew about that, and of course Sam, but….

Just then it all snapped together; Sam's crying, the tribal elders trying so hard to soothe him, the _claw_ marks.

"Oh!" I inhaled the word sharply, abruptly breaking the silence in the room. Sam's head popped up off Emily's lap and he stood up, marching over to me and grabbing me roughly by the arm. He practically dragged me out the front door out onto the porch.

I didn't wait for him to tell me what happened, I already knew. "Sam, you didn't?" I asked incredulously. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes. "Please say it isn't true!"

His eyes blazed with fury as he looked down at me. I cringed away from him, and took a step back.

"Don't pretend that you are concerned for her now! Not after what you said to her earlier." He was whispering loudly, but the heat of his anger made it seem like shouting.

I planted my feet and put my hands on my hips. I was confused by his anger towards me. It wasn't any of his business what I had said to her- that was between us.

"What does _that_ have to do with anything? This isn't _my_ fault!" I snapped.

He took another step closer to me so he towered over me. I could feel the heat from his body on my face and arms.

"If you hadn't told her to leave this never would have happened." He accused. "She was trying to leave because of what _you_ said to her, and I got upset and…and…" He could finish his sentence. He lifted his enormous hands over his face and began sobbing.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. He was blaming me? This was absurd!

"Don't you dareblame me for this." I hissed at him. "I didn't ask for any of this.

_You _chose her, _you both_ left me broken and bleeding without even a second thought. She is my cousin Sam! What did you expect me to do, just crawl quietly away and die while you two run off into the sunset together? Did you expect me to give her my blessing while she got to live out my fairytale? I don't think so! After everything that's happened I think I deserve a right to say how I feel. Just because I know how it works doesn't mean that you two shouldn't be held accountable for your actions."

He was shaking from the crying and collapsed onto the top porch step. He didn't say anything as he looked up. He just stared off into the distance at nothing. I could feel the anger bubbling up inside me again. How _dare_ he take this out on me, especially after what he did! I stomped down the porch steps and turned defiantly on my heel to face him. He didn't meet my gaze.

"You have nobody to blame here but yourself, Sam. I may have said what I said to Emily, but that is not the issue. I didn't _make_ her leave, it was her choice, and I didn't _make _you lose your temper either- you do a good job of doing that all by yourself. Go ahead and blame me if it makes you feel better, but deep down you know the truth and you will have to come to terms with that someday." I said quietly, and then I turned on my heel and left. We didn't speak for a long time after that.

"_Do you mind?"_ Sam's thoughts pulled me from my reverie, and I looked over at him. He was standing over me now, with his tail between his legs and I could feel the pain my memory had caused him. I hadn't realized I was recalling it so vividly.

"_Sorry."_ I muttered to him- and I really was sorry this time.

"_Don't mention it. I probably owe __**you**__ an apology after all this time."_ He replied. Just then his posture tightened and he whirled around to face the other direction.

_ "What is it?"_ I asked.

But no sooner than the words were out of my mouth did I realize what it was. Everyone could feel the silent shudder of the air, and the presence of a new mind joining in. Someone had phased. Jacob was back….. 


	4. Chapter 4

The moment we felt Jacob's mind reconnect to ours everyone had the same reaction to his thoughts; horror. Jacob's mental pictures were extremely tormented by the pain and anxiety and jealousy, but they were so vivid it was as if we were reliving each moment all over with him. He was moving fast, propelled to an impressive speed by his emotions, but everyone was too anxious to wait. We fled as one group to another small clearing meeting him halfway.

Even in his wolf form he resembled the burning man of Edward Cullen that he had re-conjured in his memory; a boy and a man, burning by the flames of two different fires. His thoughts were a flicker of memories; a pregnant Bella with her wickedly bruised, swollen stomach, the other blonde vampire standing as the protector, and the rest of the Cullen's and Edward helplessly adhering to Bella's wishes.

This girl was seriously mental for keeping that thing and wasting her life this way, but what else was knew? She had always been a little left of center, but I never thought she was suicidal. I sat quietly listening to the rest of the pack react to Jacob's thoughts and, to no surprise, they were already beginning to mount an attack. This time I couldn't argue- there was too much at stake.

The entire mental tenor of the pack was completely chaotic- everyone's voices mingled together, each saying different words, but they were all centered around one theme; the Cullens and death. I forced myself to focus and tuned into Jacob and Sam's conversation. Jacob, of course, did not agree with the Alpha decision and he had vehemently argued against Sam's logic.

"_We can't take chances with the unknown in this case."_ Sam explained patiently. _"We can only allow the Cullens to exist while we're absolutely sure that they can be trusted not to cause harm. This…thing cannot be trusted."_

_"It's just a baby for crying out loud!"_ Jacob wailed back at him.

_"Not for long"_ I whispered. As soon as I thought those words I regretted them. Jacob shot me a nasty look and I piped down quickly. I had no grudge against Jacob or Bella, and especially not a baby, but this was not a person afflicted by vampire venom, this was encoded on that thing's DNA! Who knew how fast it could grow, or what it was capable of?

The rest of the boys continued to argue. Quil and Jared tried unsuccessfully to help Jacob see the bigger picture, but there was no talking to him. Seth tried to convince Sam to allow the Cullens to just leave town, but as soon as the words were out of his mouth he too was silenced by an Alpha command.

Jacob let out a pained howl of desperation.

_"She's human too! Doesn't our protection apply to her?" _He pleaded frantically.

I listened to Jacob and recalled the gaunt, sickly image of Bella when Jacob had seen her. She looked like walking death already- she had to be in severe pain, and there was no way that she would even survive the pregnancy. That thing was already killing her from the inside out. Our method was bound to be quicker and more humane that just letting her waste away. I felt sorry for her…for anyone, having to die that way.

_"She's dying anyway,"_ I thought. _"We'll just shorten the process."_

I dropped my head and walked away from Jacob and Seth, but as I did I heard a fierce growl come from behind me and hot breath on the back of my leg. I spun around to see Jacob's teeth miss my hamstring by only inches as Sam bit down on his flank and pulled him away from me. His eyes were full of hate and fury as he glared at me.

"_You will not be cruel to him, Leah."_ Sam commanded. _"Bella's sacrifice is a heavy price…." _

I tuned him out as I cringed away from him, hurt. I wasn't trying to sound cruel- it was just the opposite. I was never a big fan of Bella's but I would never want her to suffer, even if this was her choice. I made my way to the outside of the circle with my back turned to the pack and laid down. The rest of the group was taking their positions for the ambush. Sam had ordered Jacob to fight and he was practically tripping over his own feet while he tried to get his head in the game.

Sam left Jacob on his belly and moved to put the rest of us in formation, but I still hung back, watching. Quil and Paul, as well as the other younger boys pranced excitedly in a circle offering to take flank or point, or whatever the older wolves were willing to give them. They looked at this as a game, scoffing at the deadly threat that lay ahead. I sat down on my haunches and let my mind drift past this pack and to the families that waited for them back home. I used to baby sit Collin and Brady when they were little. Would this be the last time I ever saw them? How would we be able to explain this to their families? And my little brother- how would my mother survive the loss of one of her children?

The thoughts brought a sharp stinging sensation to my eyes as they filled with tears. I moved up quickly then, taking point in front of Seth. He was lagging behind the other two young boys, but I didn't care. I was faster so I hoped to absorb the brunt of the fight so they wouldn't be harmed. Maybe I'd be lethal enough that they wouldn't have to fight at all.

As I sat there contemplating my strategy the futility of this fight began to settle in. Did we really need to be so hasty? I mean Bella _was_ still human, and even though she was certifiably insane, it was only natural for a mother to want to protect her child. If Jacob was right, and the Cullens were just as afraid of that thing inside her as we were, it would be much more judicious to let them handle it. At least the treaty would remain in tact and we wouldn't be losing anyone in the pack. It seemed so simple when I thought of it in those terms, but it was obvious that Sam only had one goal in mind.

Just then something changed. It was subtle, but I could feel it in the back of my mind like a nagging thought in my brain. It felt like a thread unraveling- one string coming apart from the entire garment itself. I checked behind me towards Seth, but he was still lost under the Alpha command, although I could feel his resistance to it. He looked like a tangled marionette; his legs and feet and body wanted to obey the command, but his head wanted to move the opposite direction, which was to protect the Cullens.

Collin and Embry seemed as excited as before, so I tried to ignore it and focus on coordinating with the others. But at that moment the feeling increased. It was no longer a tiny thread unraveling, it was something much more powerful; it was a member breaking away.

I caught a glimpse of Jacob out of the corner of my eye. He defiantly pushed his massive body off the ground and stood, his gaze settling directly on Sam. The hair on my back stood up as I realized exactly what he meant to do. He had never wanted to claim his birthright before this moment, but I suppose Sam had given him no choice. I cut my eyes over to Sam and the rest of the pack but they were too distracted to notice, and it wasn't like anyone was expecting _this._

Seth's ears perked up and his eyes were fixed directly on Jacob now, obviously picking up on what was happening as well. I didn't say a single word and I forced myself not to let a single thought slip as I watched Jacob walk over to stand behind Sam. Sam was the only Alpha we had ever known, and his very presence radiated authority, but it was nothing compared to Jacob in that moment. He had grown taller and looked absolutely regal as he looked down at Sam. This was his rightful place, and he was the only one who could dispute Sam's order.

Sam turned at the sound of his advance and his eyes narrowed. He was past all patience with Jacob at this point, but before he could get the first word out Jacob spoke.

"_**NO." **_

It was merely one simple word but the sound and meaning behind it stunned everyone into silence. The double timber of Jacob's voice reverberated throughout our minds, making the previous sounds of Sam's commands pale in comparison. Sam let out a surprised yelp and backed away.

"_What have you done, Jacob?"_ he demanded.

The entire pack, including myself, froze in fear. We all knew there could not be two alpha's in a single pack. The two of them circled each other with their teeth bared, neither of them wanting to go down this path. Sam tried in vain to command Jacob back into submission, but his commands were unable to touch Jacob now.

"_Ephraim Black's son was not meant to follow Levi Uley's."_ Jacob responded. His voice was full of his own alpha command but he kept his tone even and controlled. _"I won't follow you Sam, not for something so wrong."  
_ Sam rose up trying to meet Jacob's height.

"_Do you belong to a __**coven**__ now, Jacob?"_ He asked. _"This is about Bella. She has never been the one for you, she has never chosen you, and yet you still continue to destroy your life for her." _We all felt Jacob wince as Sam said the words, but Jacob stood his ground. He stepped away and raised his head high.

"_I will stand between you and the Cullens. I won't just watch while the pack kills innocent… people. The pack is better than that. Lead them in the right direction, Sam."_

And with that he turned his back and sprinted away. The entire pack was in a total uproar, torn in all directions. None of us were able to wrap our minds around what had just happened. Sam lifted his head and let out a howl that soared above all the others- we could all feel his heart breaking as he watched Jacob run away. Even the sounds of our thoughts were drowned out by the noise of the howls.

I turned to the left and trotted over to Sam, who had fallen down onto his front knees and buried his snout between his paws. I nudged him with my nose and he quickly got back to his feet and turned to face us all.

"_This doesn't change anything."_ He said defiantly. I was sure everyone could feel the conflict in his words, but the current of his thoughts had increased, and rapidly changed from heartbreak to anger in a matter of seconds. _"We stick to the plan." _

This time around the frenzy and excitement was no longer present in any of the pack members. None of them wanted to fight against their own brother, and with Jacob gone the entire pack would be off balance without a second in command. None of us were skilled enough to fill that position, and even if we were it just felt wrong, morally.

"_Sam, maybe we should hold off…re-asses the situation?"_ I offered quietly.

He glared balefully at me out of the corner of his eye.

"_Not now Leah." _

At that moment Seth stood up and took two steps in our direction, but he stopped short when Sam let his penetrating gaze fall on him. I could feel his nerve failing, and just when I thought he was going to tuck his tail between his legs and go back into formation he puffed his chest out and looked Sam straight in the eye.

"_No, I agree with Leah. We should call this off, Sam. None of us want to fight against Jacob…and he's right. Attacking the Cullens is not the answer- they didn't do anything to break the treaty and us sneaking up on them this way is low and dirty. I won't be a part of it."_

I could see the muscles twitch with anticipation in Seth's legs as he waited for Sam to crush him with an edict, but Sam didn't say anything for a long moment. He paced in a circle and blew his air out in one big gust. We could all hear the different thoughts buzzing in his head, contradicting each other: _loyalty to the pack_, _love for Jacob_, _hatred for the Cullens_, _protecting our land…its people_, and finally _the betrayal of his own brother_. The last thought drowned out all the rest as I felt the fury build inside him and spill out.

"_NO! We still fight. Jacob has chosen _his_ side which leaves me no choice."_ He hissed.

Seth's eyes popped out of their sockets, as did everyone's, when we heard this. A low grumble echoed thru the pack as the distaste for this decision circulated. Seth hung his head and walked back towards the rest of the formations. I could hear the disappointment in his thoughts, and they were layered with his own feelings of betrayal, by Sam. Seeing my little brother hurt like this was too much. We were all hurt by this decision. I turned around and glowered at Sam.

"_You no longer deserve this position."_ I seethed. I didn't even bother hiding my accusing tone as I said each word with a biting defiance. _"You are putting you own anger before the benefit of your pack. You are thinking with your emotions instead of you brain. You are not being objective. This decision was wrong from the very beginning and you are letting it rip us apart!"_

Another stream of howls erupted behind us. I was too focused on my anger towards Sam that I didn't notice Seth slowly walking past the formations towards the edge of the clearing where Jacob had disappeared. He made sure the rest of the pack was focused on our exchange before he took of racing towards the trees, and then, in a matter of seconds he was gone.


End file.
